If Heaven Has a Front Porch

 

I’ve tried to be honest with my readers about my struggles with religion.  I attempt to avoid being blasphemous but I’m sure some of my readers think I sometimes dance across that line like a water droplet on a hot griddle.  I assure you; no harm meant.

As the years pile up and my journey toward eternity gains speed, I find myself thinking about what the afterlife may be like, if indeed there is one and if I can qualify to get in.

As I’ve mentioned in previous writing, I’ve tried to live a good life and not hurt anyone but I’ve made a lot of mistakes.  I’ve also said that I’m just hoping that God grades on a curve.  If he does, or perhaps I find some way to slip in through the pearly gates when St. Peter takes a coffee break, I’ll make my way as quickly as possible to heaven’s front porch and find a seat.

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If heaven has a front porch, it’ll be a nice one.  There won’t be any rotten boards waiting to break under my weight, or splinters to jab my feet, because I do plan to go barefoot.  It’ll have a roof over it with big oak trees shading it, and a gentle breeze blowing all the time.  Logic tells me there won’t be any mosquitoes in heaven, but that’s God’s call, not mine.  If there are, the porch will be screened.

Heaven’s front porch will have rocking chairs with a few porch swings as well.  The rocking chairs won’t creep as you rock and the chains on the swings won’t pop as you swing.  Every seat will have a nearby shelf to hold a steamy cup of coffee or hot cocoa because, hey, there won’t be any diabetes in heaven so I plan to enjoy some marshmallows in my cocoa made with real sugar.

Dogs and cats will be allowed on the porch.  My childhood dog, Lad, and I can reminisce about all the rabbits we hunted together and all the miles we walked.  I just hope he’s forgotten about the shots I missed.  He’ll be able to lie on the porch swing beside me with his head on my lap just right so that my hand can rest in the perfect position to scratch his ears…just the way he always loved it.

There won’t be any limits on who you can sit on the front porch with.  I’ll be able to catch up on things with my friends who have gone before me…friends who died much too young and who left much too soon.  I’m hoping to see some of my old buddies from the Marines but, I’ll warn you now, if some of them make it, I’ll wonder about all the fun I missed out on because I was trying to be a good boy.  I’m sure some of them would pass on the coffee and hot cocoa and go for something a little stronger.  If they are there, we’ll all laugh about how wrong I was…but I’ll still stick with my coffee.

I’ll get to hug Granny Corn and Mom and Pop Higgs again.  If the porch is screened, there will have to be a spit can beside Mom and Pop Higgs’s chairs.

Dad and I will sit together and catch up on everything that has happened since he left.  We’ll talk about the farm, and Mom, and Annie, and our boys.  We’ll talk about how the boys have grown up big, strong, smart, and hard working and he’ll marvel about how well his loser son was able to raise such incredible men.

But there will be more to look forward to as well.  I’ll get to sit on the porch with Pop Corn.  Mom’s dad passed a couple years before I was born but she’s told me so many stories about him that I know we will have lots to talk about.  I can’t wait to talk to him about his old horses, Pat and Dan, and his dog Bill Dad and to hear him tell about, “Dat ole debil comin’ over them gee-willikin mountains”, about ‘possum hunting and the bear in a hollow tree.

Grandpa Matthews passed away when my dad was five years old.  Dad and I will both finally get to know him.

And it just keeps getting better.  Jaeden and Peyton will be there.  Yes, my twin grandsons who never got to see my loving face will be there.  They won’t be the unborn babies we lost.  No, they’ll be little boys.  They’ll hop up into my lap long enough for their Pa to give them the hugs and kisses I never got to and want to so badly.  Then they’ll bounce down and off the porch to go play in the cool green grass of heaven’s front yard.  I’ll probably join them for a while, tossing a ball or shooting squirt guns.

But then I’ll make my way back to the swing.  Lad and I will have to keep a spot warm for the day when Annie joins us…

…there on heaven’s front porch.