Wrong Dang House

 

Any fan of the movie, “Tremors” will remember Bert Gummer, played by actor Michael Gross.  In one of my favorite scenes, Bert and his wife, Heather, played by actress and country music star Reba McEntire are in their basement recreation room/man cave/gun storage room when a graboid (think giant worm with a beak big enough to swallow a person whole) smashes through the dense concrete wall.  As the monster crashes into the room, the couple grabs up a variety of guns and fires a barrage at the creature.  Bert puts an end to the attack when he breaks the glass on a case containing an elephant gun.  Two shots from the shoulder cannon punches the graboid’s ticket, whereupon Bert proclaims, “Broke into the wrong d— rec-room, didn’t you!”

Something like that actually happened to Canadian Bud Jardine last fall…only the monster that broke in on him was absolutely real.

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Robert “Bud” Jardine lived in Torch River, Saskatchewan at the time.  He got home from a trip at 2 a.m. one Sunday to find a black bear ransacking his house.  His guns were locked inside the house in accordance with Canada’s gun laws.  He couldn’t get to the weapons so he exited the dwelling and climbed back in his truck.  He drove to find cell-phone reception and notified authorities.

After making the report, he returned to the house accompanied by a conservation officer.  The noise and lights of their arrival scared the thieving bruin away.

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“The blinds on the windows were dragged out…there was broken glass, there was material lying all over the place,” Jardine said.

He boarded up the broken windows with the government official’s help.  After the agent left, Bud piled up pots and pans in front of the broken windows to act as a makeshift burglar alarm.  “If he gets in the house, it’s only me and the bear and it’s not that big of a house,” Jardine explained.

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A couple hours later the furry thief ripped the plywood off the window and started to climb in.  When the kitchenware alarm sounded, the homeowner, still dressed for bed, leaped up and grabbed a rifle.

“The bear had his head, full head, right in the window and I up and fired,” Jardine later recounted.

The bruin fell backward out of the window.  I think most people would have been satisfied to wait for someone to come to his house, or at least wait for daylight, but not our hero.  The intrepid gentleman pulled on some clothes and went outside.  That’s right, he went out into the dark night in pursuit of a wounded bear!

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Bud found a blood trail leading into the woods and, at that moment, noticed a bear crossing his yard.  The critter ignored him – a very bad sign – and kept moving toward a cabin near Jardine’s house.  In full defensive mode now, the man raised his rifle and dropped that bear in its tracks.

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Both carcasses were retrieved and, when the sun came up, Bud was able to survey the damage to his home.  It was found that the two bears had spent several days in his house, pillaging or destroying much of its contents.  They even bit through cans of food and upended the refrigerator.

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Oh, did I mention that Robert “Bud” Jardine was 80 years old at the time?  Yep, it was one hardy septuagenarian that took on not one but two bears, by himself, at night.

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Since his night of excitement, Jardine has borrowed a dog to keep bears away so that he can relax and get some sleep.

I think the bears should count themselves lucky if they only get their backsides nipped by a guard dog.  Bud Jardine won’t be so nice if bears break into the wrong dang house…again.

 

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(below) This will give you an idea of the kind of damage a bear can do when it breaks into a house.